No one told me

I’ve been thinking a lot about you moms lately, and I’m writing this because I’m tired, drained, and have come to my wit’s end multiple times this week.

Some of you are up three times a night with your baby. Some are juggling four kids with four different schedules.  Some are working long hours to help support your family.  Some of you hardly see your husbands because of their demanding jobs. Some feel guilty for not being there every second with your child. Some are single moms doing it all with little or no help. Some of you are trying to just get through the week without burning dinner.

You don’t skip a beat. You are there for every tantrum, every skinned knee, and every blow out. And if you’re not physically present, you’re constantly thinking about it. You are on call 24/7 and you’re trying to survive off of long hours, leftovers, and loans. You’re tired….exhausted really. Like baggy eyes, 10 cups of coffee doesn’t do a thing, forget your child’s name kind of tired….and you’re still going. We wear many hats as moms. Teacher, taxi driver, nurse, disciplinarian, cook, playmate, provider, event planner, maid, and servant. You serve, you love, you work, you cook, you cart your kids around, you give and give and give. Friends, we are STRONG. You maybe can’t do one full pull-up, but you are mighty.

No one told me the kind of work being a mother is. No one warned me that I would feel like the worst human being because I yelled at my two year old for breaking something (only later realizing he doesn’t have a value system yet and doesn’t know the difference between tearing a napkin in half and ripping out every page of his book…).  No one told me how much I’d want to run away on days that are hard or take a vacation alone. No one warned me how difficult parenting is when you literally have NO IDEA what to do when your kid steps on your baby’s leg and doesn’t listen or obey (because they’re sinners and need Jesus). No one told me how easy it is to find my identity in my children. No one told me that stretch marks don’t go away. No one told me how I’d feel like a complete failure when my kid has an off day and does nothing right. No one told me how valuable nap time is and how going to bed at 9pm at night is a wise choice. No one told me how much there is to do and how you have to do it all on three hours of sleep.

But you know what? No one told me the emotion I’d feel when they look at me like I’m their whole world. No one told me I’d completely forget the pain of giving birth the second I saw their sweet face. No one told me how choked up I’d get hearing them laugh like I’m the funniest and best person alive…or when they play outside or look up in the sky like this world is the most beautiful and perfect place. No one told me how my heart aches when tears run down their faces and how I’d turn into a sensitive crier. No one told me how excited I would be to see the kids after date night and how much I secretly wanted to talk about them the whole time at dinner. No one said how excited I would get when I heard my child say my name, please, and thank you. No one told me the strength I’d feel carrying and growing my own child. (Our bodies are beautiful and amazing!) No one told me how proud I’d be when they poop in the toilet for the first time, eat with a spoon by themselves, or stack blocks taller than they are. No one told me how great it is when they climb in your bed because they want extra cuddles or they wake up saying your name because you’re the most important person to them. No one shared with me the joy you receive from tickle fights, hide and seek, random hugs and kisses, and nursing your baby. No one said that you can get lost in their big blue eyes and literally forget anything they’ve ever done wrong. No one told me that my life would be completely spent loving my family and babies and because of that I’m living life to the fullest.

This motherhood thing…it’s hard. But only by God’s grace are we not just “getting by” but we are thriving and experiencing God in each moment. Give yourself some grace on those difficult days, and thank the Lord for His deep love for you. He not only offers you an abundant life, but He’s offering Himself. That is all I need.

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